The Cost of it All

My boyfriend and I just returned from a trip to see my family in Eastern Canada. It's one of several trips I've taken this last year or so, but one of only a handful I've taken that don't involve music or a show or a band of some kind. We had a great time, visiting my parents and relatives, sightseeing along the East coast, eating out, enjoying the local cuisine... my first lobster roll ever was decadent. If you've never tried one, and are ever able to, you must.

While waiting in the airport to head home, we had time before boarding and I decided to pick up a book. Normally SaintC and Lady Elaine swap books back and forth and chat about their latest page-turner, while I'm nowhere near as well read. We'll say I'm more of a TV person. But one book by Gail Vaz-Oxlade caught my eye. She is a TV show host for several Canadian programs dealing with money, overspending, savings, and getting your finances under control. In watching her shows I've always appreciated her approach. The book is called "Never Too Late - Take Control of Your Retirement and Your Future." I have retirement savings and some equity in my home, but I confess I've always been confused at investing and understanding what I would really need to do in order to be secure in my retirement age. I am not looking for any magic tricks here - just clear direction. So I grabbed it hoping for an epiphany.

My eyes were opened. What I like about the book is that it takes into account your overall net worth, not just savings or earnings, in determining what your needs would be. It estimated based on net earnings and not gross income, and helped you determine what you were spending, vs. how much money you made - whether you were in a positive or negative state (spending more/less than earnings consistently). Then you would calculate your "Personal Savings rate" needed, per month, to be in order to build savings that would provide around 70 percent of your income during retirement. Keep in mind this was based on a 5% rate of compound interest, which I don't think is always realistic, but an average.

The harsh light of reality: Turns out I am negative 17% on my Personal Savings Rate. I need to be saving about $500 MORE per month even to come close to catching up to where I should be. Ouch. All this time I thought I was doing ok. But I did the calculations - and although I'm responsible, pay off my credit and my other bills each month, and contribute to monthly savings, I'm overspending like a fricking demon. The numbers don't lie.

Of course I know what's to blame, and where the cashola is going. When I looked back at what I spent on travel for flights, hotels, food, taxi, concert tickets, VIP experiences, in the last 2 years or so, it was disarming. I mean, I knew it would be a lot- but what I hadn't realized is how far back all this spending is putting me off of where I need to be in the future. The book does encourage balancing enjoying your life in the moment, while being ready for what comes ahead. The problem is the scales are tipping way deep on the enjoying life side. More than maybe they should be.

And yet this past week I went ahead and booked a ticket to go with SaintC to see Duran Duran in Portland. We are going in and out overnight, no shopping or extra costs, save for taxi and food expenses, so we're looking at around 1200 bucks per person for the 24 hour jaunt. Plus our 2nd trip to the UK is just around the corner.

I can't seem to help myself when it comes to indulging in Duran Duran related activities. I'm like a junkie that keeps coming back for the next fix. But I’m faced with the possibility, like any junkie, that the cost of all this travel and entertainment and excitement could be coming at my detriment. Do I need to figure out when enough is enough, maybe kind of like hitting bottom?

But how much harm is Duran Duran doing me? And not even just to my pocketbook.. is all this band chasing and fantasizing and pining and striving and reaching for something unattainable just a way to stave off having to grow up and get serious? Or is it just a way for me to have an escape from the day to day of working, saving, exercising, investing, cleaning, dog walking, weed pulling, errand running? Why the hell should I deny myself that? Unless of course, it does me a disservice in the long run. Hmm. After writing and going back and reading this, my head hurts and I feel spent. $pent. Interesting choice of words.

Maybe next time I'm at the airport I'll pick up a copy of Vogue instead.

That Girl